Chapter 28: Not My Bag

Backgammon is not an easy game, but fortunately, the dice were on your side. You win the game, and the holographic board disappears back into the eyes of Queen Stella, who blinks and yawns, as after a restful sleep.

“Thank you, Player. Your skill has helped me re-integrate the memories from the ring.” You notice the ring in the alcove is no longer aggressively pulsing with energy, but now has a steady, pleasing glow, just like the golden crown. “It sounds like Mister Rose has put you through quite a trial.”

Pete kneels at the foot of the Queen. “Your majesty, I betrayed you and our entire kingdom in my greed. I am prepared for any punishment you name.”

“Stand up and face me, Mister Rose,” commands the Queen. “Reunited with the ring, I know all that you did. You betrayed us all in your weakness.” She pauses. “But I was weak, too. I never should have agreed to let our precious treasures be given away. I thought it might be an easy way to keep the kingdom together, but I see now that was wrong. Do you agree it was a mistake?”

“Yes, my Queen. The treasures are the heart of all our memory. Without memory, we have nothing,” he says solemnly.

“I quite agree,” says the Queen. “Will you help us to restore the kingdom?”

“I would be honored. But what can I do?”

“I’ll explain shortly.” She turns to you and Melvin. “With two treasures now recovered, I am getting a better idea what has happened. I think Mister Rose has explained some of it to you already. I now recall some of my terrible mistakes, but I recall other things as well. I know, for instance, that the baseball ring was just one of five rings related to athletic prowess. The other four were also given away as prizes for challenges, though I cannot yet remember to whom, or why. Mister Rose will stay here with me, and help me to find out where those rings have gone. If you two are willing, I need you to find a more...” she pauses, “distant treasure.”

Melvin speaks up, “Hah, we’ve already been to the top of Spike’s Peak… how much farther can we go?”

She smiles. “Oh, little missile, the Atariverse is very large. I wish I could send you on a quest for a nearer treasure, but I must work with the shards of memory that I have. The Starstone was entrusted to us by the people of the planet Solaris ages ago.” Her eyes cast out an image of a beautiful marbled orb, bathed in iridescent flame. “It has great power on its own, but when it is on its native planet Solaris, its power is nearly unlimited. The Sage of Solaris realized there is such a thing as too much power, and so he entrusted it to us to guard, and welcomed us to make use of its power, which was beneficial, but limited, so far from Solaris. And for many years, we did. But an evil race, called the Zylons, who desire nothing more than to conquer the entire Atariverse, learned of the power of the Starstone, and attacked our Kingdom, stealing it in the confusion.” She pauses, and looks down sadly. “This was the beginning of the end. It is a memory so painful, that I almost wish it hadn’t returned.”

“So…” says Melvin, “you want us to go TO SPACE?”

“You must do more than that, little missile. You must somehow gain access to a Solar Starcruiser, find your way to Solaris, and recover the sphere. Not only does it contain crucial memories, but as long as the Zylons have it on Solaris, they will create strife and war everywhere they can reach.” Her eyes project a star map with a small blinking planet emanating energy, and evil spaceships destroying world after world.

“But how will we get there?” asks Melvin. “We don’t have a spaceship!”

“I do not know, little missile. But I do know this: you are resourceful. If there is a way to recover the Starstone, you two will find it.”

Pete speaks up now. “I’ll second that. I watched these two play baseball, and,” he coughs awkwardly, “other games, better than anyone I’ve ever seen. If you can win the Atari Baseball Challenge, I’m sure you can get to space… somehow.”

Melvin pulls himself together. “Space has always scared me, but if my Queen wants me to go to space, I’ll go to space! Come on, player, to the planet Solaris!” and he zips out the blasted hole in the castle wall into the gray mist.

The Queen and Pete both laugh a little bit at Melvin’s overconfidence. You start to follow Melvin, and the Queen calls out to you: “Player.” You turn to look back. The Queen and Pete are both looking at you earnestly. “Thank you for your help.”

You give a small bow. “I am honored to help,” you say, and to your surprise, you mean it.

You and Melvin trudge silently out of the gray mist towards town. After a while, you say, “Melvin.”

“What?”

“How are we going to get to space?”

“I was just thinking about that,” says Melvin. “We could go and see Hickle… but, we owe him money, and besides, I know what he charges for spaceships, and it’s an amount of money that even Charlie wouldn’t believe.”

“Pete.”

“Whatever. And even if we did get a spaceship from Hickle, we wouldn’t know where to go, or how to fight Zylons.”

“So… what do we do?”

“Well, if you can’t afford to buy a spaceship, I figure the only solution is to get someone to pay you to fly one.”

“How’s that going to happen?”

“I’ve heard the Air and Space Authority hires pilots to fly planes, and even spaceships.”

“But… we don’t have any training.”

“Yeah… I know… but it’s the only idea I got. Unless you got a spaceship there in one of your pockets.”

This place is so weird, you check your pockets. “Nope, just a reset button.”

“Okay, then,” says Melvin, “follow me.”

He leads you down streets until you get to the far edge of town, to a futuristic building at the edge of what seems to be an airport. A sign reads “AASA: Atari Air & Space Authority.” You walk into a large lobby lined with counters facing the center. Behind each high counter sits a different administrator. Each desk has a little sign. One reads “Requisitions,” another “Sales,” another “Travel Disbursements,” and finally one that says “Hiring.” 

“Ah, this one’s for us,” says Melvin. A young woman with sandy brown hair, wearing a business suit sits behind the desk, talking on the phone. She has a nametag that says “Christa.” She hangs up, and Melvin approaches. “We’re here to join the Solaris Starcruisers.”

She stares for a solid five seconds, and then bursts out laughing. “Say that again,” she says.

“I said we’re here to join the Starcruisers!” says Melvin, a little irritated.

She laughs again, and then one more time, wiping a tear from her eye from laughing so hard. She catches her breath. “That’s… cute. Why are you really here?”

You step in. “We… are on a mission from our Queen.”

“Your QUEEN?” she says, “Okay, fun’s fun, but you sound nuts, and I’m getting ready to throw you out of here.”

You suddenly remember that most people don’t seem to remember they even have a Queen. Could it be this place is starting to affect your memory, too? “No, sorry, just kidding. We’re looking for jobs, and we’re really interested in space. We were asking about the Starcruisers because, uh, they seem the coolest.”

She laughs again. “Ha, yeah, they’re ‘cool’ alright. But Earth isn’t qualified to do any kind of galactic defense. No earthling can join the Starcruisers, the Star Masters, the Star Raiders, the Phaser Patrol, not even the Stellar Trackers. Only planets with an orbiting defense station qualify, and we don’t have one.”

“Don’t you have any spaceships?”

“Oh sure,” she says. “Two shuttles, Discovery and Challenger. But those are just used for science trips and satellite maintenance. So, do you have any piloting experience?”

“Well, no, not really,” you admit.

“Do you have any kind of aeronautical experience?” she asks, with a raised eyebrow.

“Um… no.” You and Melvin exchange despondent glances.

“I see.” She flips through binder on her desk. “Well, I’m sorry to inform you…” her phone rings. “Just a sec.” She picks it up, and after a few uh-huhs she cups her hand over the mouthpiece. “Looks like there might be a job for you after all. Interested?”

You both nod enthusiastically.

“Okay, Steve,” she says, “I’ll send someone right over.” She hangs up. “Well, that’s good timing,” she says brightly. She stamps some papers, and hands you a laminated badge. “Go look for Steve, in Terminal B, he’ll tell you what to do.”

“What kind of job is it?” Asks Melvin. “Pilot? Navigator? Shuttle Captain?”

She laughs. “You two are hilarious!” Her phone rings again, and she waves you away.

You make your way to the bright yellow Terminal B, and near the entrance, you see a husky, nervous man with glasses and a thick mustache. His nametag reveals that he is Steve. “Are you the new hire?” he asks. “Just in time. We need your help, the airport is unusually busy. Also, there have been warnings of terrorist activity.”

Melvin whispers to you. “I think you are going to be an air marshal! It isn’t space, but it’s exciting!” Steve walks you farther through the terminal. “We’re having a lot of mechanical difficulty, so we’re glad to get your help.”

Melvin furrows his brow, not that he has a brow. “Maybe you’re going to be an airplane mechanic?” he whispers uncertainly.

“Ah, here we are,” says Steve. “This baggage carousel has been kind of out of control. If you see any suitcases fly off of it, catch them, and put them over there.” Melvin smacks his forehead, not that he has a forehead, or anything to smack it with. “A baggage handler! We come in here for a job with the Solaris Starcruisers, and end up as baggage handlers!”

Steve says, “Don’t let any suitcases hit the ground, because if one opens up, they all will.”

“What?” you say, “That doesn’t make any sense!”

Steve continues. “Oh, and be especially wary if you see any black suitcases… they could explode.”

“Explode? Don’t you have any security here?” you say, somewhat alarmed.

Steve shrugs. “I told you, we’re understaffed.” A plane lands, and the baggage carousel starts up, moving way too fast. “Incoming!” Steve shouts, and runs off.

Put the Lost Luggage cartridge into your Atari 2600. Use game select 4, and set the difficulty switches to a. Play until you get 1200 points. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.