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DISCLAIMER: AtariQuest is unofficial fan content, not approved or endorsed by Atari or anyone else. I do not own and make no claim of ownership of any Atari games, names or characters that appear in AtariQuest. It is non-commercial, offered for free, and just for fun.

Monday, October 3, 2022

Chapter 31: The Thrill of Discovery

“Matching glide slope… easy… easy… touchdown! Whew! It was close, but we landed another one!” you call to Melvin, who is dashing about the ACR as your cursor, trying to line up the next plane.

Someone taps you on the shoulder, and you jump. It’s Christa, the woman who was at the desk when you first came in. “Time for your break.”

“But… who is going to land all these planes?” you ask, concerned.

“I’ve got it.” She sits down, and effortlessly starts redirecting planes into a much more sensible configuration than your semi-random hodge-podge. Only half looking at the screen, she says, “I guess you can tell we’re a little understaffed around here. The reason I came over is that another job came up that we need help with.” She switches over to the GCA, and lands a plane with one hand, even though there is a terrible crosswind. She looks down at a folder she brought in. “When you first came in, you were talking about going to space, right?”

“Yeah, we need to go to Solaris.”

“Ha, well, I don’t know about that,” she lands two more planes, “but I see on your file that you have both piloting experience, and air traffic control experience. You should have said that when you came in.” You’re about to say how you just got all that experience today, but Melvin kicks you, not that he has any feet, and she goes on. “See, the reason we can’t get you to Solaris is that we no longer have an SDS.”

“A what?”

“Space Defense Station.” She effortlessly has a rainbow of planes doing a conga line all around the ACR. “There is a system of defense shared by all members of the League of Civilized Planets to protect each other from invaders. Unfortunately, when the Players stopped coming, we stopped doing our share, and Earth got kicked out of the league. Some evil aliens came, blew up our SDS… and…” while she lands another plane with her left hand, she puts her right under her chin, and thinks hard. “…they did something else? Stole something? My… memory isn’t what it used to be. Anyway, they left us alone after that, but it means we don’t really have much defense in case any invaders come back here.” There seems to be break in the arriving planes, and she gives you her full attention. “Anyway, a few days ago, our sensors spotted a weird spaceship flying around Spike’s Peak, and it got the brass all nervous. So, they are all hot to get our Space Defense Station rebuilt.”

Melvin breaks in. “What do we have to do?”

“Fly up there and rebuild it.”

“Fly how?” you ask.

“We have two operating spaceships. Space Shuttles Discovery and Challenger. Challenger is being outfitted with construction gear, and will be ready soon. In the meantime, you can rehearse on Space Shuttle Discovery by rendezvousing with our training satellite. That is, if you’re up for the job.”

Melvin gets excited. “Oh, we’re up for it alright!”

“Wait a minute,” you say. “Okay, sure we flew the P41, and, somehow managed to land a bunch of planes, but… fly the Space Shuttle? That must take years of training!” 

She smiles. “Normally, it would. But I’m a pretty good teacher.”

You and Melvin look at each other in surprise. “You’re the Space Shuttle instructor? Why do they have you… working in recruiting?”

She smiles again. “Well, you might have noticed we’re a little shorthanded around here. So, you still want to go to space?”

You both nod dumbly. She picks up her walkie-talkie. “Hey Steve, can you take over at air traffic control?” Something indecipherable comes out of the speaker. “Okay,” she says, “we’re all set, let’s head to the training center.”

When you get to the classroom, she drops a thick book that thumps in front of you. On the front in white letters over a nighttime picture of the Space Shuttle it reads “Flight Manual.”

“Read this, and memorize it. There are a lot of steps to flying the Shuttle. One wrong move can lead to disaster.” You start flipping through the book. MECO? SSME? RCS Engines? It looks pretty daunting. 

Melvin gives a low whistle, and whispers, “This is the longest Atari manual I’ve ever seen!”

Christa dims the lights, and goes through a slide presentation of the steps of your mission, explaining details of flight preparation, launch, orbit, docking, deorbit, reentry, and landing. It’s all really complicated. After about an hour, she says, “Well, that’s about it, really. I’ll take you over to the simulators.” You and Melvin follow her to the simulator building, and you try a few test flights. The first few go badly, as you forget simple things like when to open the Cargo Bay Doors. But after a few tries, you manage to rendezvous with a satellite, then come out of orbit, and land the Shuttle again. “Nice job!” She says. “I think you’re ready for the real thing!”

She walks you down a long corridor, and then out a door, and there it is: The Space Shuttle Discovery, absolutely huge on its launching pad, a little distance away. You are stunned by the sight. When you were a kid, you used to fantasize about what it would be like to ride in it, and now you have a chance to pilot it. The three of you get into a golf cart, and she starts driving you over to it. “Christa,” you ask, “so, you’ve flown in the Shuttle before?”

She smiles. “Sure… lots of times.” She points to a patch on her jacket. “I’m not just a teacher, I’m a flight commander.” You pull up at an elevator. “Okay, here we are. Get in there, do everything I told you, rendezvous with the satellite as many times as you can manage, and then get back here safe with lots of fuel to spare.”

She shakes your hand. You can’t believe this is happening. So many things in the Atariverse are dreamlike, but this one is like a dream come true. “Thank you so much for your help,” you say. “I didn’t think I’d be able to do this, but, well, I feel like I can. You’re an amazing teacher.” Melvin nods quietly, not that he has a head.

She gives you a big smile. “Thanks, that means a lot.” She pauses. “You’re a Player, aren’t you?” she asks.

“Yes, I guess I am,” you say.

She shakes her head. “I knew there was something special about you. I had thought there weren’t any Players left… it’s almost like… I forgot that there were Players.”

“I can’t understand it myself,” you say, “but here I am.”

She smiles again. “Okay Player, well, remember everything we talked about, and come back safe, because there’s a lot more we need to do!” Her radio squawks, she picks it up and says “On my way,” and hops into the golf cart and drives off. As you watch her drive off in the golf cart wearing her blue blazer, you find yourself thinking of Charlie Hustle, zipping around in his golf cart and red blazer. But then you look at the massive Space Shuttle Discovery towering in front of you, and you hear a beep, as the elevator doors open in front of you. You and Melvin walk in solemnly, and the doors close.

Put the Space Shuttle cartridge into your Atari 2600. Follow the directions in the flight manual carefully. Feel free to use game select 1 or 2 to get familiar with the game, but use game select 3 when you are ready to go on a mission. Play until you are a verified Space Shuttle Commander, docking with the satellite six times in one mission, and landing the shuttle with at least 7500 fuel units remaining. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.

Tuesday, September 27, 2022

Chapter 30: The Right Approach

With Melvin’s help, you make a smooth landing. “Whew – just under 37 seconds!”

The man with the clipboard is back. “Hey, nice job! I guess we owe you a patch!” He hands you a patch welcoming you to the “Sky Stars.”

“Thanks,” you say, “I’ll iron it on later.”

“Yes, right,” he says, “no time now, come with me.” He starts off, walking away from the terminal this time, toward the control tower. “My notes say that you aren’t just a pilot, you also have experience with air traffic control.”

Melvin flies to your ear and whispers. “Air traffic control consoles are a lot like spaceship consoles! Say yes!”

“Uh, yeah, a little,” you say.

“Okay, great – you’ve probably noticed we’re short-handed here.” You’ve reached the tower, and he escorts you into an elevator. As it rises he asks, “Have you ever used an ACR/GCA system?”

“Uh… I don’t think so?”

He checks the resume. “Yeah, you’re probably used to something much more advanced.” The elevator opens to a control tower that seems to have no one working in it.

“Where is everyone?” you ask, somewhat alarmed.

He sighs. “I told you, we’re understaffed.”

You suddenly realize that you’ll be the only one landing planes for the entire airport, and swallow nervously.

He gestures to a console with three buttons and a microphone. You see colored airplanes going in all different directions on the screen, and some kind of weird strobing yellow line connected to a fat black line.

“See, it’s easy,” he says. “Obviously, this is the ACR screen. It’s how you keep planes from colliding, and from exiting legal airspace. Flashing airplanes are having an emergency, land those first. Guide the planes to the runway strobes, and switch to the GCA with this button here,” he points to the middle of three buttons.

“What do the other buttons do?” you ask.

“Uh…” he picks up his radio. “Hey Fred, what do these other buttons on the ACR/GCA do?” A voice on the radio crackles back, “Beats me.”

“Huh,” he says, “probably don’t wanna touch those. Anyway, like I was saying, you simply center the nose on the glide slope and the localizer on the GCA, and you’ll hear two tones to let you know it was a safe landing.”

“What if it isn’t a safe landing?”

He looks at you, seeming to wonder if you actually know what you are doing. “Well, obviously, you’ll also hear two tones, that are subtly different than the safe landing tones. Are you sure you’ve done this before?”

“Heh, yeah, sure… I was just, uh, testing you.”

“Ha, oh okay,” he says, looking back at his clipboard. “Okay, great, well, good luck, I gotta go. By the way, there’s a nasty crosswind out there today, watch for that.”

“Ha, yeah, no problem,” you say, as he steps into the elevator. You wait for it to close, then scream, “MELVIN! What are we going to do?!”

“We’re gonna land a bunch of planes!” says Melvin excitedly.

“ACG, GCR, glide slope localizer, I don’t understand any of this!”

Melvin looks out the window of the control tower. There seem to be planes flying around trying to land in all directions. “Well,” he says, “this seems like a perfect time to figure it out!”

Put the Final Approach cartridge into your Atari 2600. Use game select 3. Set the difficulty switches to b. Play until you have 500 points. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge. 

Chapter 29: Up, Up, and Away

“This job is crazy!” you shout, wiping sweat from your forehead and panting, hands on your knees. Thankfully, you’ve got a few seconds before another plane is going to land and it starts all over again.

“At least you didn’t drop any of those black suitcases!” says Melvin. “The bomb squad is dealing with those.”

Just then a harried looking man with a clipboard runs up. “Hey!” he says, “Are you the new hire?”

“Y..yes…” you say, catching your breath.

“Well, what are you doing here? We need you out on the runway, right now! Come on!”

You shrug at Melvin, and follow the man out of the terminal onto the runway. Maybe now you need to load bags on a plane? He briskly walks over to a small yellow airplane. “You’re the new pilot, right? We need this P41 tested to be sure it’s ready for duty. Fly it out across the Polo Grounds. Stay to the right of red pylons, and left of blue ones. There’s a lot of balloons out there today for some weird reason, so watch yourself.” He looks at his clipboard. “Your resume says you’re pretty hot stuff – our Polo Grounds speed record is 37 seconds – if you beat that, you’ll be our resident Sky Star! Good luck!” he calls, walking away, as briskly as when he arrived.

You start to chase after him, but Melvin stops you. “Don’t you see? This is our big chance! We have to get into space, and to do that, we need piloting experience!”

“But I don’t know how to fly a plane!”

“It’s easy, I can talk you through it. Come on, get in!” urges Melvin.

“We could go to jail!”

“No, we won’t… the security at this airport is terrible.”

You can’t argue with that… and, well, this little yellow plane doesn’t look that hard to fly…

Put the Sky Jinks cartridge into your Atari 2600. Use game select 1. Set difficulty switches to b. Play until your score is less than 37 seconds. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.

Monday, September 26, 2022

Chapter 28: Not My Bag

Backgammon is not an easy game, but fortunately, the dice were on your side. You win the game, and the holographic board disappears back into the eyes of Queen Stella, who blinks and yawns, as after a restful sleep.

“Thank you, Player. Your skill has helped me re-integrate the memories from the ring.” You notice the ring in the alcove is no longer aggressively pulsing with energy, but now has a steady, pleasing glow, just like the golden crown. “It sounds like Mister Rose has put you through quite a trial.”

Pete kneels at the foot of the Queen. “Your majesty, I betrayed you and our entire kingdom in my greed. I am prepared for any punishment you name.”

“Stand up and face me, Mister Rose,” commands the Queen. “Reunited with the ring, I know all that you did. You betrayed us all in your weakness.” She pauses. “But I was weak, too. I never should have agreed to let our precious treasures be given away. I thought it might be an easy way to keep the kingdom together, but I see now that was wrong. Do you agree it was a mistake?”

“Yes, my Queen. The treasures are the heart of all our memory. Without memory, we have nothing,” he says solemnly.

“I quite agree,” says the Queen. “Will you help us to restore the kingdom?”

“I would be honored. But what can I do?”

“I’ll explain shortly.” She turns to you and Melvin. “With two treasures now recovered, I am getting a better idea what has happened. I think Mister Rose has explained some of it to you already. I now recall some of my terrible mistakes, but I recall other things as well. I know, for instance, that the baseball ring was just one of five rings related to athletic prowess. The other four were also given away as prizes for challenges, though I cannot yet remember to whom, or why. Mister Rose will stay here with me, and help me to find out where those rings have gone. If you two are willing, I need you to find a more...” she pauses, “distant treasure.”

Melvin speaks up, “Hah, we’ve already been to the top of Spike’s Peak… how much farther can we go?”

She smiles. “Oh, little missile, the Atariverse is very large. I wish I could send you on a quest for a nearer treasure, but I must work with the shards of memory that I have. The Starstone was entrusted to us by the people of the planet Solaris ages ago.” Her eyes cast out an image of a beautiful marbled orb, bathed in iridescent flame. “It has great power on its own, but when it is on its native planet Solaris, its power is nearly unlimited. The Sage of Solaris realized there is such a thing as too much power, and so he entrusted it to us to guard, and welcomed us to make use of its power, which was beneficial, but limited, so far from Solaris. And for many years, we did. But an evil race, called the Zylons, who desire nothing more than to conquer the entire Atariverse, learned of the power of the Starstone, and attacked our Kingdom, stealing it in the confusion.” She pauses, and looks down sadly. “This was the beginning of the end. It is a memory so painful, that I almost wish it hadn’t returned.”

“So…” says Melvin, “you want us to go TO SPACE?”

“You must do more than that, little missile. You must somehow gain access to a Solar Starcruiser, find your way to Solaris, and recover the sphere. Not only does it contain crucial memories, but as long as the Zylons have it on Solaris, they will create strife and war everywhere they can reach.” Her eyes project a star map with a small blinking planet emanating energy, and evil spaceships destroying world after world.

“But how will we get there?” asks Melvin. “We don’t have a spaceship!”

“I do not know, little missile. But I do know this: you are resourceful. If there is a way to recover the Starstone, you two will find it.”

Pete speaks up now. “I’ll second that. I watched these two play baseball, and,” he coughs awkwardly, “other games, better than anyone I’ve ever seen. If you can win the Atari Baseball Challenge, I’m sure you can get to space… somehow.”

Melvin pulls himself together. “Space has always scared me, but if my Queen wants me to go to space, I’ll go to space! Come on, player, to the planet Solaris!” and he zips out the blasted hole in the castle wall into the gray mist.

The Queen and Pete both laugh a little bit at Melvin’s overconfidence. You start to follow Melvin, and the Queen calls out to you: “Player.” You turn to look back. The Queen and Pete are both looking at you earnestly. “Thank you for your help.”

You give a small bow. “I am honored to help,” you say, and to your surprise, you mean it.

You and Melvin trudge silently out of the gray mist towards town. After a while, you say, “Melvin.”

“What?”

“How are we going to get to space?”

“I was just thinking about that,” says Melvin. “We could go and see Hickle… but, we owe him money, and besides, I know what he charges for spaceships, and it’s an amount of money that even Charlie wouldn’t believe.”

“Pete.”

“Whatever. And even if we did get a spaceship from Hickle, we wouldn’t know where to go, or how to fight Zylons.”

“So… what do we do?”

“Well, if you can’t afford to buy a spaceship, I figure the only solution is to get someone to pay you to fly one.”

“How’s that going to happen?”

“I’ve heard the Air and Space Authority hires pilots to fly planes, and even spaceships.”

“But… we don’t have any training.”

“Yeah… I know… but it’s the only idea I got. Unless you got a spaceship there in one of your pockets.”

This place is so weird, you check your pockets. “Nope, just a reset button.”

“Okay, then,” says Melvin, “follow me.”

He leads you down streets until you get to the far edge of town, to a futuristic building at the edge of what seems to be an airport. A sign reads “AASA: Atari Air & Space Authority.” You walk into a large lobby lined with counters facing the center. Behind each high counter sits a different administrator. Each desk has a little sign. One reads “Requisitions,” another “Sales,” another “Travel Disbursements,” and finally one that says “Hiring.” 

“Ah, this one’s for us,” says Melvin. A young woman with sandy brown hair, wearing a business suit sits behind the desk, talking on the phone. She has a nametag that says “Christa.” She hangs up, and Melvin approaches. “We’re here to join the Solaris Starcruisers.”

She stares for a solid five seconds, and then bursts out laughing. “Say that again,” she says.

“I said we’re here to join the Starcruisers!” says Melvin, a little irritated.

She laughs again, and then one more time, wiping a tear from her eye from laughing so hard. She catches her breath. “That’s… cute. Why are you really here?”

You step in. “We… are on a mission from our Queen.”

“Your QUEEN?” she says, “Okay, fun’s fun, but you sound nuts, and I’m getting ready to throw you out of here.”

You suddenly remember that most people don’t seem to remember they even have a Queen. Could it be this place is starting to affect your memory, too? “No, sorry, just kidding. We’re looking for jobs, and we’re really interested in space. We were asking about the Starcruisers because, uh, they seem the coolest.”

She laughs again. “Ha, yeah, they’re ‘cool’ alright. But Earth isn’t qualified to do any kind of galactic defense. No earthling can join the Starcruisers, the Star Masters, the Star Raiders, the Phaser Patrol, not even the Stellar Trackers. Only planets with an orbiting defense station qualify, and we don’t have one.”

“Don’t you have any spaceships?”

“Oh sure,” she says. “Two shuttles, Discovery and Challenger. But those are just used for science trips and satellite maintenance. So, do you have any piloting experience?”

“Well, no, not really,” you admit.

“Do you have any kind of aeronautical experience?” she asks, with a raised eyebrow.

“Um… no.” You and Melvin exchange despondent glances.

“I see.” She flips through binder on her desk. “Well, I’m sorry to inform you…” her phone rings. “Just a sec.” She picks it up, and after a few uh-huhs she cups her hand over the mouthpiece. “Looks like there might be a job for you after all. Interested?”

You both nod enthusiastically.

“Okay, Steve,” she says, “I’ll send someone right over.” She hangs up. “Well, that’s good timing,” she says brightly. She stamps some papers, and hands you a laminated badge. “Go look for Steve, in Terminal B, he’ll tell you what to do.”

“What kind of job is it?” Asks Melvin. “Pilot? Navigator? Shuttle Captain?”

She laughs. “You two are hilarious!” Her phone rings again, and she waves you away.

You make your way to the bright yellow Terminal B, and near the entrance, you see a husky, nervous man with glasses and a thick mustache. His nametag reveals that he is Steve. “Are you the new hire?” he asks. “Just in time. We need your help, the airport is unusually busy. Also, there have been warnings of terrorist activity.”

Melvin whispers to you. “I think you are going to be an air marshal! It isn’t space, but it’s exciting!” Steve walks you farther through the terminal. “We’re having a lot of mechanical difficulty, so we’re glad to get your help.”

Melvin furrows his brow, not that he has a brow. “Maybe you’re going to be an airplane mechanic?” he whispers uncertainly.

“Ah, here we are,” says Steve. “This baggage carousel has been kind of out of control. If you see any suitcases fly off of it, catch them, and put them over there.” Melvin smacks his forehead, not that he has a forehead, or anything to smack it with. “A baggage handler! We come in here for a job with the Solaris Starcruisers, and end up as baggage handlers!”

Steve says, “Don’t let any suitcases hit the ground, because if one opens up, they all will.”

“What?” you say, “That doesn’t make any sense!”

Steve continues. “Oh, and be especially wary if you see any black suitcases… they could explode.”

“Explode? Don’t you have any security here?” you say, somewhat alarmed.

Steve shrugs. “I told you, we’re understaffed.” A plane lands, and the baggage carousel starts up, moving way too fast. “Incoming!” Steve shouts, and runs off.

Put the Lost Luggage cartridge into your Atari 2600. Use game select 4, and set the difficulty switches to a. Play until you get 1200 points. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.

Thursday, September 22, 2022

Chapter 27: Back Gamin’ Again

The stands erupt with cheering, and fireworks launch over the stadium. The white robots pick you and Melvin up and carry you triumphantly around the bases. When you get to home plate, there stands Charlie, with a tear in his eye. He speaks into a microphone, and his words echo throughout the stadium. “I declare… this Player… to be the official winner… of the Atari Baseball Challenge!” The stands again erupt into cheering, and Pete presents the ring to you on a velvet pillow. You take it and hold it up, and its gold seems to glow as you hold it in your hand.

“YAHOO!” shouts Melvin, zipping in a spiral all around you, Pete, home plate, and the ring. “Let’s take it to the Queen!”

You start to walk out of the stadium, but then stop and look back at Charlie, or rather Pete, and Melvin says, “Well, aren’t you coming?” He scrambles out of his umpire gear, and runs over to you. “Yes,” he says, “I… need to make things right. Come on, we can take my golf cart!” You climb into the golf cart, wave goodbye to all the fans, as Pete Rose drives you out of the majestic stadium.

Melvin looks at the stadium, and asks Pete, “Will it turn back to a cornfield now that the game is over?”

“I hope not,” says Pete, glancing back at it. “I hope it can stay there a long, long time.”

You ride through town, and everyone waves excitedly to see you. It seems word has spread about the game. You pass out of the edge of town to the gray, rocky area where the ruined castle lies. The cart bumps and tips over the rubble strewn field. Pete grimaces. “I haven’t been here in ages. I… had no idea it would be this bad.”

You get out of the cart, and show Pete the hole in the wall that you and Melvin created on that first day, and you all climb inside. As before, the Queen sits on her throne amidst the gray gloom in a computing trance.

Knowing that words alone are unlikely to wake her, you slip the ring onto her finger. Immediately there is a pulse of color, and you get another glimpse of a beautifully appointed rainbow colored throne room, which immediately snaps back to gray. The Queen’s eyes snap open, and glowing numbers appear in the air reading “2/26.” You see electric energy start to pulse around the ring on her ebony finger, which then floats off her hand, and up into its alcove. She looks at you, blinking, and with great effort, says, “You… have found it… the second… treasure. So… many… memories…” you see all kinds of images flashing by her eyes. Again, with effort, she says, “I need… your help… to reconnect… let us play… a very… old… game…”

Suddenly, her eyes cast out a blue and green holographic gameboard into the space before the throne. You immediately recognize it as backgammon, though the checkers are square instead of round. Pete stands to the side, head bowed reverently. Melvin whispers, “I hope you know how to play backgammon.” You look at the glowing ring up in the alcove, then at the floating backgammon table, and make your first move.

Put the Backgammon cartridge into your Atari 2600. Use game select 3, and set the difficulty switches to a. Play until you are able to win. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.

Tuesday, September 6, 2022

Chapter 26: A Rose by any Other Name

The jumps were terrifying, but Absent Mind hung in there, and you win the race by almost a single pixel! You are surrounded by cheering well-wishers, who put a big horseshoe of flowers around the neck of Absent Mind, who marches around goofily, but proudly. But where is Melvin? Where is Charlie? You search the crowd, but don’t see either of them anywhere. But suddenly Melvin zips in. “Nice jumping, Player!”

“Yeah, thanks – but where’s Charlie?”

“When you won, the crowd went kind of crazy, and I lost him. I checked at the betting window, and he collected his money, but I can’t find him or his golf cart anywhere.”

“Well, that’s it then,” you say sadly. “I guess he got his money and we won’t see him again.”

Melvin is devastated. “I can’t believe I lost him! How will we get the ring now?”

“Melvin, I don’t think he ever had it, it was all a con. I think we have to go back to the Queen empty-handed.”

You return to the stables, and change out of your jockey clothes, and say goodbye to Absent Mind, who neighs appreciatively. As you turn to go, a little robot wheels up, and hands you a note.

“What’s it say?” asks Melvin.

You read the hastily scrawled note: “Don’t forget – cornfield tomorrow. –CH”

“Oh, come on,” says Melvin. “What’s the point? There’s nothing out there. Say… wait a minute… what if now that Charlie has his money, he wants to get rid of us?”

“I don’t know. He seems greedy, but… murderous? I guess it’s hard to tell with those dark glasses he always wears.”

Melvin suddenly becomes courageous. “We survived the Skull Spirit, we can certainly survive a con man. We are on a quest for a ring for our Queen, and we must face danger, whatever form it takes.”

You chuckle. “Okay, Melvin, sounds like we have a plan. First thing tomorrow, we head to the cornfield.”

You spend another night at the luxurious casino, and at dawn, Melvin shows you the way out of town to the cornfield. It is dismal and desolated, seemingly untended for years. Dry, yellow cornstalks are in broken rows for as far as the eye can see. You stand around for about a half hour. Finally Melvin says, “He’s not coming, is he?”

“No.”

“What are we going to tell the Queen?”

“We’ll just tell her we failed, I guess.”

Just then, you hear a sound, a distant whine. Far down a dirt road you see Charlie in his electric golf cart headed your way. You both watch as he drives up, parks at a distance, and starts walking toward you. You suddenly realize that no one is around for miles. Charlie’s dark glasses glint in the sun, and he smiles a broad grin. He reaches inside his red sport coat, and Melvin shouts “Player, get down!” You put your hands up defensively, and Charlie pulls out… a ring.

The ring is set with four diamonds that sparkle like rainbows in the sun. “Good morning, Player,” he says. “Nice day for baseball, don’t you think?”

Melvin is losing his mind. “The ring!” he shouts excitedly. “You have the ring!”

“Yes,” Charlie says, sounding ashamed. “Yes, at last I have the ring again. I’m afraid I owe you an explanation. It will help if you know who I am. You see, Charlie Hustle is… just a nickname.” He takes off his dark glasses, and you see his face for the first time, and it takes you a moment to process who you are looking at.

“Pete Rose?” you say, astonished and confused.

“Not exactly,” he says. “More like the memory of Pete Rose.”

Melvin looks at both of you. “I’m not getting this,” he says.

Charlie, or rather, Pete, or rather, the memory of Pete explains. “See, a long time ago I got in a lot of trouble for mixing baseball and gambling. I made some really stupid choices. Once I got banned from baseball, I didn’t know what to do. But at some point, I found my way here, into the Atariverse. In some ways, it’s always 1984 here, which was before I made my mistakes, so I could be a baseball star again, and I loved it. But then the Atariverse started to crumble. Players stopped coming, treasures got stolen. I can’t remember everything about it, but I remember my part in it – at least, I remember now, now that I have the ring back.” He gazes down at the ring, turning it over in his hand. “The treasures really do hold the memories of this world. Now that I hold this, I remember more what happened. You see, not all the treasures were stolen.”

“NOT stolen?” asks Melvin. “Then where did they go?”

“Players helped keep the world safe,” he explains. “They solved problems, defeated invaders, kept evil at bay.” He smiles, “Not to mention keeping sports interesting. You can only watch robots play sports for so long, because they always play the same way. Anyway, we started to talk about ways to lure Players here. Big challenges, with treasures for prizes. We didn’t realize the treasures held our memories.” He keeps gazing at the ring. “That’s the thing about memory. When it starts to slip away… you don’t always notice, because… you don’t remember.” He’s quiet for a long moment. “So, everyone was proposing challenges to the Queen, and in her desire to save the kingdom, she was granting them. My proposal was the Atari Baseball Challenge. The idea was that we would challenge Players to win the most difficult baseball games in the kingdom, and then they would enter a final game that I created, which was to have been the most elaborate and challenging baseball game in the history of Atari.”

“So what happened?” asks Melvin.

“The Queen granted my request, and I was put in charge of the challenge. She gave me the ring, which was to be a prize for the greatest baseball Player in the kingdom.”

“So who won?” asks Melvin.

Pete clenches the ring tightly in his fist. “That’s just it. NO ONE won, because I wouldn’t let them. I had started gambling again, and I set expensive entry fees to feed my gambling habit. It was a perfect life for me – I could play baseball during the day, and had plenty of money to gamble at night. I realized, though, that if someone won the challenge, it might all be over. So, I set a fee so high that no one could afford to enter the final game.”

“So, no one won?”

“No one really got a chance to try. Then, the number of Players got smaller and smaller, and eventually, none were coming at all, which meant no baseball, and no casino money for me.” He unclenches his hand, and looks sadly down at the ring in his cupped hand. “So, I sold it.”

“You SOLD the ring?” asks Melvin incredulously.

“Yes,” says Pete, disgusted with himself. “I sold it to a rich jewelry collector I met at the casino. He didn’t know what it was. But it gave me enough money to keep up my gambling for years.” He looks at you now. “When you showed up, I was down to my last twenty-five bucks, hustling pool, and didn’t know what I was going to do. My memory was mostly gone, too. I had forgotten so much. But I had a feeling, when I met you, that you could turn it all around. At first, I admit,” he looks down at the dirt, “I had no plan other than to use your luck to score a few bucks.” He looks at Melvin. “But when you talked about the Queen, memories started to come back. Every time you mentioned her, I felt so guilty, and I didn’t know why.” He clenches the ring again. “But now I remember. And I realized that I had to get the ring back, and make things right. So I needed you to win all those games to get enough cash to buy back the ring.” He opens his hand and holds it up between two fingers. You see that it has a miniature baseball diamond carved into it, with an actual diamond set at each of the bases and home plate.

“Well, that’s great!” says Melvin. “We’ve got the ring, we can bring it back to the Queen!”

“No,” says Pete adamantly.

“What do you mean, no?” shouts Melvin.

He looks at you both. “I want to keep my word. I told the Queen that I would run this challenge, that I would create the most fabulous baseball game that the Atariverse had ever seen, and that I would give the ring to whoever was able to win it.” He slides the ring onto his finger.

“But you haven’t done that!” shouts Melvin. “You never created anything. There is no final game!”

“But there can be,” he says, “if we unlock the power of the ring.” He pulls out a little brush, like umpires carry, and walks over to a little flat spot in the cornfield. He bends down, and brushes it off, and to your surprise, reveals a white pentagon, which you recognize as a home plate. “I set this here, years ago, back when I was serious about the challenge. I had forgotten all about it, until I met you. Are you ready for some baseball?”

“Here in this cornfield?” says Melvin. “How is that even possible?”

Wordlessly, Pete bends down again, and touches the ring to home plate. At first, nothing happens. But then, to your amazement, everything around you starts to change. Green grass starts to sprout out of the ground, and the red clay of a baseball diamond. White bases pop right out of the clay. Blue walls and the seats of a tremendous stadium telescope up out of nowhere, and a giant scoreboard proclaims “PETE ROSE BASEBALL.” Huge white robots in spotless baseball uniforms come running out of the dugouts. Unlike the weird, pixelated baseball robots you are used to, these are more detailed, and move like humans, not like robots.

You even find yourself suddenly attired in a professional ballplayer’s uniform. The organ plays the national anthem, and as the last echoes of “and the home of the brave” die away, Pete stands nearby, now dressed as an umpire. He looks at you, and says with pride, “I play baseball one way… all out!” You think you see him wipe a tear from his eye. “Are you ready?” he asks. You and Melvin are speechless, and you take in the view from the pitcher’s mound of the most beautiful baseball stadium you could ever imagine. You look back at Pete, who has taken his place as umpire behind home plate, and nod solemnly.

“Then… PLAY BALL!” he calls, and the game begins.

Put the Pete Rose Baseball cartridge into your Atari 2600. Choose the single player game. Play until you win. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.

Saturday, September 3, 2022

Chapter 25: Horsin' Around

Incredibly, you win again.

“Wow!” shouts Melvin. “I can’t believe it! You won a game in the Super league! There’s no baseball challenge any greater than that in the entire Atariverse!” You look around, and see stands full of cheering fans, and your yellow robots are taking elegant bows. But you don’t see Charlie anywhere.

“I knew it,” you say to Melvin. “Charlie has disappeared.”

But as you head back to the dugout, suddenly he comes running up, winded. “I knew you could do it!” he shouts, pounding you on the back. “You’ve really made it, kid!”

You’re angry now. “Made it, huh? Made what? Made YOU a bunch of money. Melvin tells me there aren’t any more baseball leagues. I’m starting to think that the ‘Atari Baseball Challenge’ is all a scam.”

Charlie looks petrified. “No… no… listen, it’s not anything like that,” he says, in a calming voice. “You’ve… made it to the last level. No one’s done that before. If you can win one more game, I promise you, you’ll get the ring.”

You and Melvin look at each other. “Well, when is this game? And where is it?” you ask, suspiciously.

“It’s… tomorrow,” says Charlie. “In the cornfield.”

“The cornfield?” laughs Melvin. “What is this, Field of Dreams?” You start wondering how Melvin knows so much about movies.

Charlie looks down, and blushes. “Listen, I know it sounds crazy, but, yes, the cornfield. The final game will be there. It will. But there’s one thing…”

“NOT THE CASINO!” you and Melvin both shout.

“No, no, I told you, we’re done with the casino,” says Charlie.

“Then what?” you ask.

“Well, this final game… it has a REALLY high entrance fee.”

“How much?”

Charlie blushes again. “A hundred thousand dollars.”

Melvin pretends to faint. Then he shouts “Where are we going to get that kind of money? DON’T YOU DARE SAY AT THE CASINO!”

“I’ve entered you in a race,” says Charlie.

You and Melvin look at each other. “What kind of a race?” you ask.

“A horse race. You are going to ride Absent Mind in the third race today. Since you’re a new jockey, the odds are forty to one. So, if we put down $2,500, we’ll win a hundred grand!”

“But I don’t know anything about riding horses!” you say.

“I know,” says Charlie, pleadingly. “But you don’t know anything about slot machines, or blackjack, or poker, or even baseball, and look how far you’ve come. And I know why, Player.” He looks at you meaningfully. “It’s because you’re lucky. If there’s one thing I know, it’s luck. And from the first moment I laid eyes on you, I could tell that you were lucky.”

Melvin loses it. “This is nuts! You can’t fool us! I know a long con when I see it. You’ve been stringing us along, and if we win this horse race, you’re going to take the money and disappear, and we’ll be stuck here with no ring, watching the kingdom turn gray and crumble to pixels! Why should we trust you?”

Charlie turns solemn. “Look, I know it’s hard to understand. I’ve done some terrible things, things I really regret. But if you can win the race, and win the last game, I promise you, you’ll get the ring. Because you’re right, the Queen needs the ring. I didn’t understand it before, but I understand now.” He looks at his watch. “But there’s no time! We need to get you to the racetrack! They’re on the second race right now. Come on!” He hops on a little golf cart, and you ride with him toward the exit. Fans are waving, some seem to want autographs. Reluctantly, you wave back as the cart zips out to the street.

Before you know it, the cart arrives at the racetrack. Charlie pulls up at a low building with a sign that reads “Video Arcade™ Stables.” Charlie hops off, and dashes inside. You and Melvin follow him in, and see four horses, munching away at pixelated hay. Four signs read “Little Dictator”, “Just Missed”, “Lucky Devil”, and then, the horse Charlie runs up to: “Absent Mind.”

“Here’s your horse,” Charlie says proudly. You look the horse over and have to admit that the vacant expression on its face doesn’t give you a lot of confidence. It looks like a better bet than Just Missed, but doesn’t have the fire and energy of either Little Dictator or Lucky Devil. But you don’t really seem to have any choice in the matter.

“So… I just ride the horse around the track, right? And, uh, try to stay in front?” You take a look out at the track, and are alarmed to see an array of fences and other obstacles on the track.

“No,” says Charlie, “This is a Steeplechase. You will need to signal the horse to jump, with light taps of your heel. A light tap and he’ll do a short jump, a heavier tap, and he’ll do a longer jump.”

“So… longer jumps are safer?”

“Yes, right, but they are slower.” He strokes Absent Mind who has a goofy, cross-eyed expression, which isn’t easy for a horse. “Anyway, I’m sure you’ll get the hang of it. At least I hope you will. The race starts in two minutes!”

You scramble into your jockey gear, and mount the horse. “Melvin, what will you do?”

“You’re on your own with this one, Player… there’s not much I can do. We’ll root for you from the stands!” The horses are led to the starting gate, and as you look over the purple, blue, and yellow horses, and of course, your own red horse, you think, “I’ve been in this place too long. It’s starting to seem normal.” The starter pistol sounds, and Absent Mind rockets out of the gate!

Put the Steeplechase cartridge into your Atari 2600. Use game select 2. Choose the paddle that controls the red horse, which is the third from the top. Play until you are able to win the race. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.

Sunday, January 9, 2022

Chapter 24: One More Game

More than one monocle pops at the sight of Charlie Hustle dancing and shouting in the most elegant room in the casino. He gathers up the money in both arms. “Great job, as always, kid! See you at the stadium!” He runs off.

The other bettors look down their noses at you as the ultra-elegant tuxedoed robot escorts you and Melvin out of the high stakes poker room, back out through the fancy doors, which he closes, leaving you outside the silver door, in the main room of the casino. You and Melvin head outside. Before you start walking, you look up at the large, gold-colored casino building, and think for a minute. “What is Charlie up to?” you ask.

“That’s just what I’ve been wondering,” replies Melvin. “So far, he’s been true to his word, getting us into all these baseball games, but something isn’t right.”

“Yeah. Didn’t you say that Super league is the highest league?”

“Sure, that’s right,” says Melvin.

“Well, didn’t Charlie say there were two games left to win the challenge?”

“Yeah… that doesn’t make much sense… unless they are both in the Super league? I guess we better ask him.”

“Yeah, if we see him again. I get the feeling he’s just going to take all the money and disappear.”

“But then we’d never get the baseball challenge ring!” says Melvin, alarmed.

“I know, that’s what I’m worried about.”

The two of you walk to the Super stadium, which is the grandest one you’ve seen yet. It has a gigantic sign reading “ATARI SUPER BASEBALL”, with “BASEBALL” in glowing red letters, “SUPER” in glowing blue letters that keep turning upside down, and “ATARI” in gorgeous, glowing spectronium letters. Everything looks sleek and modern. No red uniforms this time, there’s a white team and a yellow team, and you are on the white team. The robots are smaller than at the Super Challenge stadium, and much faster. As always, Melvin is there with you in the locker room, ready to be the baseball. “Super baseball is pretty much like Realsports™ baseball, actually,” he explains, “just faster and slicker.” 

A batboy runs into the locker room. "Are you the Player?" he asks.

"Yes," you answer, wondering what he wants.

"The umpire wants to know... do you want the game in easy mode, or impossible mode?"

You and Melvin look at each other. Melvin whispers, "Given those choices, I'd pick easy."

"Uh... easy?" you say, uneasily.

"Got it," he says, calling "Hey Frank, set the left difficulty to a!" as he runs out the door.

"What was that about?" you ask Melvin. You flip through the Super Baseball manual which is sitting on the bench. “There’s nothing about difficulty switches in here…”

"Beats me," he says, shrugging.

You hear the organ play a weirdly monotone version of “Take Me Out to the Ballgame” as your opponent's sleek white robots all dash out onto the field. “Well, Melvin,” you sigh, “here we go again!”

Put the Super Baseball cartridge into your Atari 2600. Use game select to pick “1 PLAYER / 1ST UP”. Set both difficulty switches to a. Play until you win. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.

Chapter 23: Deal With It

Again, you win! Again, Melvin is excited, and again, Charlie comes out onto the field in his red jacket to shake your hand, and say “Great job, kid!”

You’re getting sick of this. “What does it take to win the baseball challenge, anyway? How many more games?”

Charlie hems and haws a little. “Just… two more.”

Melvin is exuberant. “So, the Player wins two more games, and we get the ring?”

Charlie fidgets. “Sure, sure. Right.”

“So, what game is next?” asks Melvin.

“It’s the Super league,” says Charlie.

“Wait, isn’t this the Super league?” you say, puzzled.

Charlie laughs. “No, no, this is the Super CHALLENGE league. Totally different.”

“Wow!” says Melvin. “The Super league is the best of the best! There’s nothing higher than that!”

“Wait…” you interrupt. “If there’s nothing higher than that, why are there two more games?”

Charlie breaks in. “There’s no time for that now. The Super league game is this afternoon…”

“…and we need to go to the Casino,” you and Melvin say in unison.

Charlie puts his hands up defensively. “Okay, okay, you’re right. But I promise – this is the last time.”

“Really?” asks Melvin. “This is our last trip to the casino? You promise?”

“Absolutely,” says Charlie. “See, we need $2500 to play in the Super league game, and with the money we have now, I can get you into the Stud Poker game. After watching you win the Poker Solitaire, I’m SURE you can win this!”

Melvin raises an eyebrow, not that he has eyebrows. “And you’re SURE this is our last casino trip?”

Charlie puts his hand on his heart. “Scout’s honor.”

“What kind of scout are you?” you ask skeptically.

“I scouted you out, didn’t I?” says Charlie with a smirk. “But come on! The big game starts soon!”

“The Super league game?” asks Melvin.

“No, no – Stud Poker!” says Charlie, hustling off the field.

Back at the Casino, you are met by an even more elegant robot, with a thinner mustache, and a more expensive looking tuxedo. He leads you through a set of silver doors, then a set of glittering gold doors, and finally through a set of shimmering rainbow spectronium doors into a huge room appointed with beautiful carpets, gorgeous paintings, and a spectronium chandelier over a single table. An enormous robot shuffles cards with incredible speed in absolute silence. Six men and women sit around the table holding their cards with perfect posture, wearing incredibly expensive clothes, and peering at their cards through monocles with cigarette holders clenched gently in their teeth. Charlie is there, looking out of place in his tacky red jacket and tie. The robot who brought you in dusts off your seat, and gestures for you to sit down. “Okay,” says Charlie, “this is the big time, but I know you can do it. Five card stud, standard rules. Go get ‘em!” He claps you on the back, and the other players look at you skeptically. You swallow nervously as the giant robot silently deals you each two cards, one up, and one down.

Put the Casino cartridge into your Atari 2600. Use game select 3, and set both difficulty switches to a. Play until you have at least $2500. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.

Chapter 22: Time to Phone a Friend

“YES YES YES!” shouts Charlie. The throng of well-dressed onlookers claps politely. The croupier pushes over a neat stack of bills, which Charlie quickly scoops up and pockets. “Nice going, kid! This will get us into the stud po…” he catches himself. “I mean, the super challenge league.”

You yawn. “Please not another baseball game tonight… I’ve played a double header today already, not to mention three trips to the Casino.”

“Yeah,” says Melvin earnestly. “An exhausted Player can’t win, and we need the Player to win, for the Queen’s sake.”

Charlie seems to collect himself. “Right, right, for the Queen’s sake. Tell you what,” he says. “I have business to attend to, anyway. Why don’t you go up and get some rest, and we’ll meet at Super Challenge Stadium first thing tomorrow?”

“How many stadiums does this town have?” you wonder aloud.

Melvin laughs, “If there is one thing that this town loves, it’s baseball! There’s stadiums all over!”

“Ha, yes, right,” says Charlie, now seemingly in a hurry. He snaps his fingers, and the tuxedoed robot seems to appear from nowhere. “Please show these two to a room,” says Charlie. “And make it nice! They need their rest.”

“Very good sir,” says the robot deferentially. “If you’ll follow me…” Charlie waves a gleeful goodbye as you follow the robot to the elevators.

The hotel room is hard to believe. It has an enormous four-poster bed made of onyx, chairs and tables made of silver and gold, and a bar made of some weird metal that glows in every color of the rainbow. You stare at its hypnotic glow with tired eyes. “Melvin, what is this stuff? I’ve seen it a few places now.”

“That’s spectronium,” says Melvin. “It’s the most precious material in the entire Atariverse. It’s not only beautiful, but indestructible. It’s what the Rainbow Castle is made of.”

“But… that got destroyed.”

Melvin is irritated now. “I know, you don’t think I know that? It’s just one more thing around here that doesn’t make any sense.” He calms himself. “But… it’s okay. We’re going to fix it… somehow. If you can win the baseball challenge, and we can get the ring, well, maybe Queen Stella can fix things.”

You crawl under the covers of the giant bed. Thinking about your situation just makes you more tired. “Melvin, that’s just the second of twenty-six treasures, and I’m getting the feeling that they aren’t going to get any easier to find. Is this really going to be worth it?”

Melvin is uncharacteristically quiet now. He turns down the lights, and glides over to a velvet pillow that seems to have been provided just for him. “I love my Queen, because she represents all that is good and right in the Atariverse. And right now, I’m watching that fall apart before my eyes. Be patient Player, get some rest. Don’t worry about the quest, all you have to worry about right now is winning another baseball game.” He puts the light all the way out.

You drift off to sleep, thinking about pixelated baseballs, but in the back of your mind, you hear the laughter of Charlie Hustle.

The next morning, you find yourself back on the ball field, in your bright red uniform. This stadium is a lot like the Realsports™ one, but everything is cleaner and brighter. Your bright red robots are bigger and chunkier, like upside-down exclamation points, and they have a peculiar gait when they run.

“Okay,” says Melvin, “this is a lot like the Realsports™ league, but you’ll have better control over your pitches.” You cup Melvin in your hand, and throw out a trial pitch. An eerie sound seems to come from everywhere. “Boowoowoowoowoowoowoowoowoop!” and when the catcher catches Melvin there is a weird “Deedle-dee!” kind of sound. The catcher robot wings Melvin back to you.

“What the heck was that?” you ask.

“Ha, yeah,” says Melvin. “The Super Challenge league is big into sound effects. It’s the organist, I think. Anyway, don’t let it throw you… when you throw me!”

You take a look around the stadium again. “Hey… where’s the shortstop?”

Melvin laughs, “Yeah, no shortstop in this league. Maybe that’s the ‘super challenge.’”

You wind up for the first pitch. “Just when I think this place can’t get any weirder, it finds a way.”

“That it doooooeeeeeeesss…..” says Melvin, as he zips toward the plate, drowned out by the sound of… whatever that weird noise is.

Put the Super Challenge Baseball cartridge into your Atari 2600. For this game, you will need to find a friend to play against. You’ll play the red team, your opponent will play blue. Play until you win. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.

Tuesday, January 4, 2022

Chapter 21: Solitaire-y Entwinement

“Nice job, kid!” says Charlie. “I always like seeing the red team win!” The stands are full of cheering fans. The robots all march back to the dugouts.

“What’s next?” asks Melvin.

“Well,” says Charlie, “If you are up for it, the next step is the Super Challenge league.” 

Melvin whistles, then stops himself. “But, don’t tell me, we need more money.”

“You guessed it,” says Charlie. “To get in there, you need another five hundred. And I know just how to get it. But you’re going to have to be clever.”

You look at Melvin, sigh, and look back at Charlie. “Well, we made it this far. What do we do?”

“Just meet me back at the Casino, and I’ll handle the rest!” He runs off, gleefully.

After you clean up, you and Melvin head to the Casino. It’s nighttime now, and it glitters with a million rainbow pixel lights. You walk in the main doors, into the throng of casino-goers and suddenly realize you have no idea where to go. “Melvin, where are we going?”

Melvin flies around this way and that, peering over the crowd. He flies back down. “I have no idea. Maybe the blackjack tables again?”

Just then, a robot in a tuxedo steps up, with a prim expression. “Excuse me, I believe you are here to meet Mr. Hustle?” You both nod. He raises an eyebrow. “Right this way,” he says, and wheels off into the crowd, who seem to clear a path for him.

You follow him through the crowded casino, until you arrive at a large green table with a robot croupier shuffling a deck of cards over and over, while a beaming Charlie Hustle stands nearby. “Ah ha! Here you are! Just in time!” He gleefully ushers you onto a stool in front of the table.

You look out at the table, and see twenty-five squares marked in a grid. “This… isn’t blackjack,” you astutely remark.

“No, no it isn’t! Something much better! All you have to do is it lay out the cards you get from the dealer into rows and columns, trying to make the best poker hands you can. The better the hands you lay out, the more money you’ll make! Do it right, and you could get as much as three thousand, three hundred and forty dollars!” He appears to restrain himself a little bit. “But… don’t get greedy. All you need right now is to win another five hundred bucks, and you’ll be all set. Are you ready?”

You look over the grid… it seems simple enough… maybe? People in elegant evening dress are looking on with much interest. The robot dealer shuffles the cards one last time. “Be careful,” whispers Melvin. “This game is harder than it looks.”

You take a deep breath, and press the reset button.

Put the Casino cartridge into your Atari 2600. Use game select 4. Play until you are able to win $500 or more in a single game. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.

Monday, January 3, 2022

Chapter 20: Let's Get Real

“WOOHOO!” shouts Charlie, throwing dollar bills into the air, and doing a jig as they flutter down. Melvin whispers in your ear. “I’m kind of worried about him.” A robot attendant collects up the loose money, collates it into a neat pile, and hands it to Charlie.

“Well, Player, you did it!” Charlie says, “five hundred smackers!”

“So,” says Melvin, “we can play in the Realsports™ game now?”

“Oh,” says Charlie, suddenly coming back to reality, “Yes, right… the Realsports™ game.” He furrows his brow a little. “Let’s head over.”

The Home Run stadium seems dinky compared to this one. You change into a red uniform, and see that the locker room is filled with robots, all standing perfectly still. They stare straight ahead, eerily. “Why so many base runners, Melvin? Are they spares?”

“No way, Player! This is your team!”

You stare at the inert robots. “If I have a robot team, do I have to do anything? Do I have to control the ball like before?”

“You can’t control the ball in the Realsports™ league,” says Melvin. “I mean, it will still be me, but there’s none of that waving around. You’ll have to do actual pitching – fastballs, sinkers, risers, all that stuff.”

“Yikes, sounds tricky. But I just have to pitch?”

“No, no,” says Melvin. “You have to control the whole team. It’s like before, but you control them, instead of me. Try it now. Stare at one of them, and get him to move around.” You try staring at the robot on the end, and imagine it running back and forth in the locker room. And the robot starts doing it!

“Melvin, this is really creepy.”

“Well, get used to it. And speaking of creepy…”

Charlie walks in. “Getting used to the robots, eh? You’ll have the hang of it in no time. Which is good, because the game is about to start!” The robots spontaneously all run out onto the ball field. “Good luck, kid – I know you can do it! At least, I hope so – I got a lot riding on this game!”

Melvin flies into your mitt, and you trot out onto the pitcher’s mound. The field seems huge, and the stadium is full of fans. Melvin peeks out of your mitt at the stands and whistles. Then he looks up at you. “Don’t worry, you can do it. Just remember one thing.”

“What?”

“No spitballs! It’s gross!” says Melvin. You chuckle, and wind up, as a yellow robot steps up at the plate.

Put the Realsports™ Baseball cartridge into your Atari 2600. Choose game select 4. Play until you win the game. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.

Chapter 19: Hit Me

“YAHOO!” shouts Melvin. “We did it!” The scoreboard makes it clear – the game is over, and you won! The blue robot stomps grimly back to the dugout.

As you head back to the locker room, Charlie is there to congratulate you. “Nice job, kid! You’re on your way!”

“That was the weirdest game of baseball I ever played,” you say. “I had to do all the pitching, all the hitting, and all the fielding, not to mention telekinetic control of the ball. I’m exhausted.” You don’t even want to think about the red robots that looked just like you that served as base runners. “And I have to play how many more games like this?”

Charlie claps you on the shoulder. “Ha, yeah, Home Run baseball has a lot of… character. But don’t worry about that – you’ve graduated to the big leagues now! I’ve got you lined up for a Realsports™ game.” 

Melvin is excited. “Wow! That’s great, when?”

“Just as soon as we come up with the $500 entry fee.”

Melvin looks skeptical. “So, more slot machines?”

“No way!” says Charlie. “You’re moving up to the big time. Blackjack is our game! You get cleaned up, and I’ll see you back at the Casino!” He briskly heads out the door.

“That guy seems to really like the casino,” says Melvin.

“You’re telling me.” You shower and change, and then you and Melvin head back to the casino. The blackjack tables are in a more elegant part of the casino.

“Hey!” says Melvin, pointing at an excited woman with a rounded bob haircut. “Is that… Carol Channing?”

You shrug, looking for Charlie, who is already there and playing. You arrive just in time to watch him bust. He seems disappointed, but he sees you, he is all smiles. “Hello, Player!” he beams, and gestures to the seat next to him. “You know how to play, right?”

“Yeah, more or less.”

“Alright! Then place your bets! Here we go!” Charlie rubs his hands together, as the robotic dealer sends two cards your way.

Put the Blackjack cartridge into your Atari 2600. Set the left and right difficulty switches to a or b, depending on your rules preferences. Play until your total is $500. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.

Chapter 18: Take Me Out to the Ballgame

“Alright!” shouts Charlie, as coins come gushing out of the slot machine. He runs his hands through the pile of coins gleefully.

“So… that’ll be enough?” you ask.

“Sure, sure!” he says. “Enough to get you into the Home Run league, anyway.” He counts out the money. “198, 199, 200. Okay, you’re all set. Head over to Home Run stadium. You’ll be on the red team, naturally.” He proudly brushes off his bright red jacket. “If you head over now, you’ll have time to warm up. See you there!” He disappears into the Casino crowd.

“I don’t like that guy,” says Melvin, brooding.

You don’t much like him either. “I don’t get it,” you say. “If he’s lying about the ring, why is he letting us do the challenge at all?”

“Beats me,” says Melvin. “But I guess we’ll find out. That is, if we can win. You ready to play some ball?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be,” you shrug.

“Home Run baseball is a little… weird,” explains Melvin.

“Weird how?”

“It’s hard to explain. Only two players, but also ghosts, and you can control the ball with your mind.”

“Okay, yeah, that does sound weird.”

“Yeah,” says Melvin. “It has a bad rap, but it’s really fun. Come on,” he says, “You pitch and hit, and I’ll be the ball.” He’s excited now. “Baseball and helping the Queen at the same time? This is gonna be great!” He zips out towards the door, and you thread through the crowd after him.

When you get to the stadium, Charlie is there to meet you, and points you to the locker room, where you change into your red uniform. Melvin meets you out on the mound. “Okay, let’s warm up a little. Pitch me right over home plate.” The blue robot you are going to play against is still in its dugout. You wind up, and pitch Melvin towards the plate. ZIP! He goes in a perfectly straight line. He zips back to you and says, “That was pretty good, but that’s not how it’s played here at Home Run stadium. Here, the ball can wiggle all over the place.”

“Okay,” you say, “so start wiggling.”

“No, no,” says Melvin, shaking his head, not that he has a head, “you control me with your mind. Try again.” You wind up again, and pitch the ball toward the plate, but this time imagine it veering left, and then right back over the plate. And it works! Melvin zips back. “Alright! You’ve got the hang of it! Now all you have to do is get it past this guy.” A large blue robot with gritted teeth comes lumbering out of the dugout and stomps up to the plate. A mechanical umpire calls out “Play Ball” in a robotic voice, and the game begins.

Put the Home Run cartridge into your Atari 2600. Use game select 1, and set the difficulty switches to b. Play until you are able to win the game. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.

Sunday, January 2, 2022

Chapter 17: You Don't Know Jackpot

 “CLUNK.” You sink yet another ball on your ninth and final shot. Charlie’s mouth falls open in astonishment, and he almost loses his toothpick. You notice that others in the pool hall have been watching, particularly as your score started to rise. You aren’t sure how many times you hit that reset switch. Funny thing how that switch works – it seems to actually rewind time, so that bad things never happened. You know you failed at dozens of the trick shots you took, but to Melvin and Charlie, it looks like you did everything right the first time. Melvin was a big help during the game, shrinking into a little dot that helped you line up your shots.

“Well, I’ll be.” says Charlie. “That kind of playing deserves a trophy. I guess you really are a Player.”

“That’s what I’ve been saying!” says Melvin, exasperated. “Now, tell us about the baseball challenge.”

Charlie folds his arms. “Well, the idea is you play against a series of teams, each better than the last. Beat ‘em all, and you win.”

“Sounds good,” says Melvin. “When do we start?”

Charlie seems a little excited. “Ha, well, I guess we can start today. There’s a game at Home Run Stadium this afternoon.” He pauses, and looks at you again. “I like watching the locals play and all, but it’ll be good to see a Player playing again.”

“You won’t just see us play, you’ll see us WIN,” says Melvin.

Charlie laughs. “Ha, right. Maybe you will, at that.” He laughs again, “Maybe you’ll be the first players in history to beat the whole baseball challenge!” He keeps laughing.

“And if we do, WHAT will we win?” says Melvin.

Charlie stops laughing. He’s quiet, then says “You just win, that’s all.”

Melvin laughs. “What? Not even a patch? What about the ring?”

Charlie’s eyebrows raise again. He glances around nervously. “What ring? I don’t know anything about a ring.”

Melvin says, “You know perfectly well what ring. The winner of the baseball challenge wins a ring.”

Charlie looks down, “I…” he looks up again. “Look,” he says, smiling. “I don’t know anything about that. Ask anyone in here. HEY,” he shouts to the room, “anyone know anything about a baseball ring?” You see some people shrug and shake their heads. He continues. “I don’t know where you got that idea, but hey, I’m happy to enter you into the contest, if you want. If you win, you can tell everyone you beat the Atari Baseball Challenge. Easy as ABC, am I right?” he grins. “All I need from you is the $200 entry fee, and we’re all set.”

You and Melvin look at each other. “We don’t have any money,” you say. “We had some gold and diamonds, but, uh…”

“We gave them to a pirate,” finishes Melvin.

“No problem, no problem at all,” says Charlie, gesturing broadly. “Lots of Players don’t have money. Tell you what, I’ll spot you $25, and we’ll go win the rest!”

“From where?” you ask.

“Ha, follow me!” he says, and hustles up the stairs and out the door of the pool hall. You and Melvin follow him up the stairs, and see that he is heading down the street, to a large glittering building with a huge gold sign reading CASINO.

Pixelated doormen in red uniforms hold the doors open. “Good morning, Mr. Hustle,” they say. He smiles, and Charlie ushers you in. There is a huge array of gambling games of every type and description. “What do you think?” says Charlie, beaming.

“I think we’re gonna lose our shirts!” mutters Melvin.

“Right this way,” says Charlie, walking up to a row of machines. “No better way to turn $25 into $200 than the old slot machine.”

“I’m not sure about this…” you say uncertainly, looking at the one-armed bandits.

“Aw, come on,” he says. “Listen, it’s my $25. And I’ll bet right alongside you.” He sits down to your left. “And besides, if things go wrong, you’ve always got your reset button, right? So, here’s some coins – drop ‘em in, and give it a spin! You’ll have your $200 before you know it!”

Melvin shakes his head, but, you don’t see much alternative, and Charlie is right… you do have your reset button…

Put the Slot Machine cartridge into your Atari 2600. Choose Game Select 1, 3, 5, or 7. Play until you have $200 or more. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.

Chapter 16: A Clean Break

You are starting to get into the pinball game when Melvin comes back. He’s whispering. “Okay, I think I found someone who might be able to help us. I asked around about the baseball challenge, and most people couldn’t remember anything about it. But everyone says if you want to know about baseball, ask this guy.” He gestures over to a guy wearing dark glasses and a bright red sportcoat, who is patiently chalking his cue. There’s a toothpick in his mouth. You follow Melvin over.

“Scuse me,” says Melvin. “People say you know a lot about baseball.”

“So what if I do,” he says, and leans over the pool table to take a shot.

“We’re here to do the baseball challenge,” says Melvin. “I’m a missile, and this is my Player.”

This statement blows his concentration, and he pops the cue ball right off the table, and you catch it.

He looks up at both of you. “There aren’t any more Players,” he says. “Everyone knows that.”

“Yeah, everyone that remembers,” says Melvin suspiciously. “And what am I, then, a floating cocktail napkin?”

The man in the red coat stands up straight and looks at both of you. “You can’t have a missile without a Player, I guess.” He seems to think about that for a minute. Then he extends a hand. “Name’s Charlie.”

“Just Charlie?” asks Melvin.

You shake his hand and he smiles. “Some people call me Charlie Hustle.” He leans back and looks you over. “So… a Player, after all these years.” He switches his toothpick back and forth a few times. “And somehow, you heard about the baseball challenge.”

“We heard about it from our Queen,” says Melvin, in a steely tone. “Queen Stella, who defeated Lord Tyrannus, remember?”

Charlie stares at Melvin for a long time. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” says Charlie, quietly. Then, brightly, “But I do know about baseball. We’ve got baseball games all over this town… but it’s been a long time since a Player showed up to play.” He looks at you. “So, you’re really a Player, huh?”

“Show him your reset button,” says Melvin.

You take it out and hold it up. His eyebrows go up. He shifts his toothpick around. “Yeah, that looks legit, all right. But, tell you what,” he says, “just so I can be sure, why don’t we play a little pool? I never met the Player yet who could resist a game of trick shot.”

You look at Melvin, who shrugs.

Charlie looks at your hand. “Toss me that cue ball.” He starts setting up balls on the table. “Standard rules. I’ll set up ten trick shots, you get a point for each ball you sink. Two bonus points for sinking every ball in a shot. I figure, if you really are a Player, you ought to be able to get at least 25 points.”

“Then we can talk about the baseball challenge?” asks Melvin.

“Yeah,” replies Charlie with a smile, handing you a cue stick. “Sure thing.”

Put the Trick Shot cartridge into your Atari 2600. Select game “1T”. Play until you get 25 points. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge. 

Saturday, January 1, 2022

Chapter 15: A Sporting Chance

It almost breaks your brain, but somehow you manage to remember twenty numbers in a row. Suddenly the grid vanishes, and the Queen seems to come out of her trance. She blinks and puts a hand to her head. “Thank you Player, and you too, little missile.” With effort, she sits up proudly. “I cannot thank you enough for returning my crown.” She looks back at the delicate golden crown you restored to her, now resting peacefully in its alcove. “I did much computing while you were away, and have a better understanding of the gaps in my memory… in the gaps in everyone’s memories. Now that the crown has returned, some of those memories are coming back to me. You see, each treasure stores part of the memory of our kingdom. With so many treasures missing, much memory of what was is missing as well. But you have returned the first of the twenty-six treasures, and so, perhaps there is hope of restoring all of them.”

Melvin does a sort of a bow. “My Queen, if I may ask, did your computation reveal how this all happened so fast? I’m sure there were thousands of players here just a few days ago.”

The Queen looks at him sadly. “Oh, little missile, that is not so. I know there was a time when there were so many Players that your services were required constantly. But what I now recall is that gradually, the number of Players declined, putting our land in peril, because Players have always protected us from great dangers. I believe that eventually, Players stopped coming altogether for many years. During that time, little missile, your services were not required, and so you were not in active memory.”

“Wait a scan line,” says Melvin, “are you saying that the kingdom fell apart, and I slept through it? How long did it take? Weeks? Months?”

“What year is it now, little missile?” asks the Queen.

“Why, it’s 1984, of course!” pipes up Melvin.

The Queen looks at you. “But it isn’t, is it, Player?”

You look down at your blocky shoes. “No, your majesty.”

“WHAT?” says Melvin, “Then what year is it?”

You shift uncomfortably. “It is decades after that.”

“WHAT? What am I, Rip Van Pixel?” says Melvin, astonished. “Were you asleep too, my Queen?”

“No, I was not. Missiles are special, because they only appear with Players. There have been no Players for a very long time.”

“So, what happened to the kingdom? How come no one remembers you?”

She shakes her head. “I was not asleep, but I don’t know what happened, either. Too much of my memory is missing. All I have are some fragments of memory, much like the fragments of rubble that litter this throne room,” she says looking around sadly. “However, now that you’ve returned the crown, helped me to reconnect to it, I have new fragments that did not exist before.” She looks at you. “Player, are you willing to help recover another treasure for us? You are under no obligation.”

You find yourself surprised to remember that you’re supposed to be wanting to go home. Just as you used to get lost in videogames when you were young, you realize that you are becoming lost in this one. But nothing feels bad about that. Gradually, this strange world is becoming more real for you, and you realize how much you want to help Melvin and the Queen.

With a mixture of pride and surprise you hear yourself say “I would like to return home sometime. But right now, I see that your kingdom is in need, and I would like to help any way I can.” Melvin zips around you in an excited circle.

The Queen says, “Your bravery and loyalty are much appreciated, Player. It is enough to make one wonder if you could indeed be the Player of legend, said to have the power to restore our fallen kingdom.”

Inwardly, you shake your head. You were just a goof at a yard sale. “I appreciate your confidence in me, but I have no idea where we should go, or what we should do to recover the other treasures.”

She looks down sadly. “My memory fragments don’t amount to much, but they do tell me this. Some of the treasures were stolen by villains and other evil forces that have long existed in our world. The lack of Players emboldened them. I have a vague memory of some of them… but not enough to be useful.” She sits quietly, brooding.

Melvin breaks the silence. “So… can we help you remember, somehow…?”

“No,” she says, sounding almost angry. “No, I don’t think I’ll be able to recall them without more treasures. However, I have other memories.” Another long pause.

“Such as…?” asks Melvin, nervously.

“Memories of discord in the Kingdom. When the Players stopped coming, some people panicked. People lost faith in the kingdom.” She pauses. “People lost faith… in me.” If she wasn’t so regal, you think she’d probably start crying. “They lost faith in my leadership, and they had all kinds of ideas about how to use the treasures to lure players back into our world. I can’t really remember everything that happened, but I do know that one treasure was to be the prize of a sporting contest. Here is what I see.” Her eyes start projecting again, and in the blue light you see a hologram of a baseball, a bat, and a shiny ring hovering in the air.

Melvin says, “This is great! All we have to do is win a baseball game, and we can get the next treasure!”

She shakes her head grimly, “I don’t think it will be so easy. I recall that the contest was quite difficult, which is why no Player ever achieved it.”

“Have no fear, my Queen!” says Melvin boldly. “We shall win the contest, and recover the treasure!” You smile a little seeing how much he likes playing up this “servant to royalty” stuff. But you suppose it makes sense – he is sort of a squire, and you realize that makes you… a knight?

You look around at the rubble again in the sad, gray castle. “Your majesty,” you venture, “are you sure that we should leave you here? The castle is in such ruin, and, well, will you be safe here?”

Melvin seems worried too. “My Queen, there are things you should know about our quest for the crown.” He proceeds to tell her about it in much detail. The jumping car, the pirate, the boys, the igloos, the dangerous spaceship, and the pirate again. The Queen listens to it all, and pronounces, “The pirate you mention does our kingdom a great honor, helping with the crown quest when he could not even remember his own Queen.”

“Yes,” says Melvin, “but what worries me is that spaceship. Who is it? And what if they come for you?”

The Queen is stern now. “You have not lost your memory, little missile. You know I cannot leave the castle. I will be safe here – everyone has lost so much memory, they don’t even know I exist.” She now sounds angry with herself. “And if something does happen to me, it is my own fault for letting the kingdom fall, and nothing can be done about it.”

Melvin objects, “But, my Queen…”

“Enough. I know what I have done. I appreciate your help to make things right, but if I have put myself at risk, I must accept that. We all must be brave if the Kingdom is to rise again.” She looks tired, and now speaks quietly. “I will rest now, and later compute some more. There are great dangers we will have to face, but for now, they cannot find us. If you can recover the ring from the baseball challenge, it might be enough for me to remember more that we can use.”

Melvin bows. “We will do our best, my Queen.” She closes her eyes. You bow as well, and you both turn and exit.

As you walk from the gray castle into the gradually more colorful town, Melvin explains where he is taking you. “There are a lot of baseball stadiums around here, but I don’t know which one has the challenge… if the challenge even still exists. But I know a place where people will know.” You turn a corner, and see some steps going down under a building. A pixelated sign reads “POOL” with two crossed cues underneath. Melvin explains, “These guys bet on every game in town. If there is some baseball challenge around, they’ll know about it.”

You walk down the stairs into the smoky pool room. Various shady characters are playing pool and otherwise loitering. Nobody really seems to notice you. Melvin says, “I need to chat with some of these guys to find out what is going on. Since people are suspicious about Players right now, maybe you should stay out of the way until I know what is going on.”

“Should I leave?”

“No, no, I might need you. Hey, I know – how about you play that pinball machine?” He points to a game labeled “BUMPER BASH.” You shrug, and saunter over to give it a try.

Put the Bumper Bash cartridge into your Atari 2600. Play until you get 50,000 points. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.

Chapter 14: A Crowning Achievement

 Using the flags you planted on the way up the mountain as a guide, you ski down the mountain at incredible speed. Finally things level out, and you find yourself running out of snow, your skis skidding onto the grass below the ice line. You stop and turn, and see the spaceship circle the mountain once, and then zip off into the sky. You get the feeling it didn’t like being seen in the daylight.

Still looking up at the mountain, you see Melvin zipping down the mountain toward you. He arrives, and plunks down on the ground next to you, panting. “I’ve never seen anyone ski so fast!” he says, still out of breath. “We sure showed them,” he says triumphantly. “Take that, space jerks!”

You take off your skis, and your winter coat, and pack them up, since it is warmer here, especially with the sun shining on you. “Melvin, what was that spaceship?”

Melvin looks serious. “I don’t know. But I think they didn’t like us taking the crown back.” 

Behind you, suddenly, a voice. “Har har, har har, so ye got the crown, eh?”

You both turn to see the pirate, holding up his pistol.

“That’s right!” shouts Melvin. “And no two-bit pirate is going to take it from us!”

“Har har, har har,” says the pirate. “I have no interest in crowns, especially ones that aliens be looking for.” He holsters his pistol. “Besides,” he says. “I’m out of bullets. But I have two items of business to discuss with ye. First,” he produces a small patch with a picture of a skier on it, and flips it to you. “That was some mighty fancy skiing. I believe ye have earned membership in the Activision Ski Team.” He goes on. “Second, it seems you two had quite an adventure. I watched the whole thing with my spyglass.” He holds up his brass telescope. “And while I don’t want yer crown, there is one thing I do want from ye.”

You and Melvin look at each other. “Ice diamonds?” you ask. He shakes his head.

“Gold nuggets?” asks Melvin.

“Har har, har har,” he laughs. “Of course I’d be glad to have some of that treasure, but no, what I want is more valuable than that.” He draws the pistol again.

“I thought you were out of bullets?” says Melvin. BANG! A warning shot grazes the top of Melvin’s pixel.

“Har har, har har,” he laughs. “I was just joking about that. No, it’s about the flags.”

There is a long silence.

“The flags,” says Melvin.

“The flags,” you say, wondering what he could possibly want now.

“They were ‘elpful, waren’t they?”

You look up at the trail of flags that guided you back down the mountain, and realize that, yes, they actually were.

“In fact,” says the pirate, cocking his pistol, “you could say they saved your life.”

“Yeah, I guess so,” you admit.

“THEN SAY IT!” shouts the pirate. “SAY THE FLAGS SAVED YOUR LIVES!”

You both stare him, and repeat in unison, “The flags saved our lives.”

“Thar,” he says, holstering his flintlock again, “was that so hard? Now, if I might inquire, where are you two adventurers heading next?”

“Yeah, Melvin, how are we getting back? Our car exploded all over the beach, remember?”

Melvin hesitates. “Yeah, well… uh...”

The pirate speaks up. “I thought ye might be in need of transport, and though I don’t remember our Queen, I very much like the idea of doing a favors for royalty. To that end, my pirate ship is at your service.” He makes a sweeping gesture with his feathered hat, and makes a surprisingly deep bow for someone with a peg leg.

Melvin hesitates. “Do you promise you won’t shoot at me again?”

The pirate makes a strange salute. “Pirate’s honor.”

Melvin asks, “And what will you charge us for the trip?”

The pirate smiles. “Well, now that ye ask, some gold and diamonds would help me cover… expenses.”

You pull Melvin aside. “Can we trust this guy?”

Melvin shrugs, not that he has shoulders. “Maybe? He’s definitely crazy, but I don’t think he’s dangerous, and I believe him about the Queen. Besides, what other choice do we have? I wanna get out of here before that spaceship comes back.”

“I guess you’re right.” You return to the pirate. “Okay, I guess we have a deal.” You shake his hook.

“Arr, ye won’t regret it. I’ll have ye back to yer castle before the next vertical blank.” You follow him over a sand dune, and see his ship. It is a small pirate ship, but you have never seen anything so festooned with flags in all your life. It has pirate flags, flags of all nations, and flags of all colors. You both climb aboard, and you both fall asleep on the deck, caressed by warm ocean breezes. By the time you wake up, the ship is already at the port near Queen Stella’s gray castle. The pirate lets you off, and you pay him with gold nuggets and the diamonds you collected inside the mountain. “Much obliged, me hearties! Give my regards to yer Queen, and perhaps I’ll see ye again one day.”

You both wave to him as he sails off. “That guy was nuts,” says Melvin.

You make your way back to the castle, which is still in a gray gloom. You clamber over rubble as you enter through the hole you made a few days ago. Inside, the Queen still sits amongst wreckage, her glowing blue eyes in some kind of a trance.

“My Queen!” says Melvin. “We have returned, with your crown!”

She makes no movement, no response. Her eyes are lit, but appear to be closed. After some awkward time goes by, Melvin whispers, “I think she’s computing. Try putting the crown on her.”

You take the crown from your backpack, unwrap it from the treasure map, and reverently place it on her head. Like when you blew the whistle, there is a sudden pulse of color and warmth in the cold, gray room, and a large “1/26” floats in the air for a moment. Also, you could swear that some of the rubble has vanished, that the room looks less ruined than before. Electric currents seem to be pulsing through her crown, which floats up into one of the alcoves behind her. The Queen’s electric hum rises in pitch until it is more of a whine, and suddenly, with a chord of musical notes, her eyes project out a grid of nine squares. One of them lights up and makes a tone.

“Is this more tic-tac-toe?” you ask Melvin, a little confused.

“No,” he says, “this is more like… what do Players call it? Oh yeah, ‘Simon.’ Just do what she does. I think this will help her access the memories in the crown. I hope that your memory is better than everyone else’s around here.”

Insert the Brain Games cartridge into your Atari 2600. Use game select 2 for the “Touch Me” game, and set difficulty switches to b. Play until you are able to get a score of 20. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.