Chapter 92: The Grille

“Sensational!” shouts Gary, as you woozily stagger out of the racecar. You’ve been racing around the city of Phenix all night, and only pulled over because you were almost out of gas, and saw him waving you down. “That was amazing driving! What action! What drama!”

“But Gary,” you say, exhausted but alarmed, “the Mortii are still after us!”

“No, no, they aren’t,” Gary laughs. “The sun is up! The Mortii have all gone home! They can’t be out in the sunlight.” And, indeed, the large square sun pixel is cresting the horizon, and you notice your car radio no longer makes that beeping and bomping noise.

“I knew there would be drama in the city of Phenix, but I never thought it would be this good!” says Gary, clapping you on the back.

“Good?” you shout. “They almost killed us!”

“Yeah, sorry about that… turns out when Mortii drink Mountain Dew, they get nasty. Who knew?” he says, shrugging. You are ready to strangle him, but pause a moment when you see some of the film crew gassing up your racecar. Gary hops in the driver’s seat. “Come on, get in!” he says. Reluctantly, you get into the passenger seat, ready to pass out from racing and shooting all night.

He pulls away from the curb, beaming. “Your battle against the Mortii was TV gold! It’s a great start to Episode 3! It was so good I cancelled your rematch against Crashin’ Clyde! Between you and me, I don’t like that guy,” Gary confides.

“THAT GUY TRIED TO KILL ME HUNDREDS OF TIMES!” you shout blearily.

“Yeah, so we’re on the same page,” says Gary calmly, as he shifts gears, speeding up. You can’t help notice he’s headed toward a dead end.

“Hey, wait a minute,” says Melvin. “We drove around this city all night last night. There was no way out, we were boxed in! Where are you going to go?”

He speeds up more and more, heading right toward a concrete wall, and you and Melvin brace for impact just as a door slides down and he goes racing through it onto a desert highway, like it is no big deal. “Phenix is on lockdown at night, because of how people who live there can be kind of… rambunctious. But once the sun is up, you can drive right out.”

“Well, where are we going?” asks Melvin.

“Indiana. I’ve got another great sponsorship deal, this time with Automated Food Services.”

“Auto-what?” asks Melvin.

“They own a burger place called ‘The Grille,’ famous for making burgers really, really fast! Their world champion burger maker is a guy named Short-Order Sam. They agreed to sponsor an episode if you could break Sam’s record.”

“Seems like there’s a lot of Sams around here,” says Melvin.

Kool-Aid… Mountain Dew… Aliens… Burgers… your head is spinning. Gary looks over at you with some concern. “It’s a ways away. Why don’t you get some…” you doze off before he has a chance to say “sleep.”

When you wake up, it is midday, and the orange racecar is parked outside of a silver diner with a huge sign reading “THE GRILLE”. The driver’s seat is empty. The parking lot is crowded with people. You and Melvin get out of the car, and everyone starts applauding. You hear Gary’s voice on a megaphone. “Here comes the contender, folks! I hope you’re hungry!” Everyone cheers, and the camera crew escorts you to the kitchen. They quickly suit you up into a chef’s outfit, and you see you are surrounded by whirling silver machinery.

“Wow,” says Melvin. “Look at all this!” And he’s right. Meat, cheese, vegetables, and hamburger buns are flying every which way.

Energetic music starts playing, and Gary shouts, “Stand still for your close up!”

“Wait!” you say, your chef’s hat falling over your face. “I don’t know what I’m doing!”

“That’s fine – just stand still till the music stops!”

“Make me one with onions!” calls Melvin, licking his non-existent lips.

“Melvin, that’s not helping!” you shout.

“GO!” shouts Gary when the music stops, and you start running!

Place the Pressure Cooker cartridge into your Atari 2600. Set the left difficulty switch to b, unless you can’t stand the music, in which case, set it to a. Use game select 1. Play until you score 45,000 points. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.