Chapter 48: Round Three... Fight!

The crowd counts down “3… 2… 1…” and a completely naked referee suddenly appears out of nowhere and declares you the winner. Spectronium starts flashing like a hyperactive rainbow all around you, and you see your green opponent hang their head and trudge out of the ring.

Blessedly, the floor of the ring cools down.

“You did it!” calls Melvin, spinning around your head excitedly. “And you’ve got the belt to prove it!”

You squint through the sweat in your eyes. “Melvin, why is the referee naked?”

Melvin laughs. “He’s not naked. He’s just wearing a pink rubber suit.”

“Why would the ref wear a rubber suit?”

“Don’t try to make shufflefoot karate make sense.”

You head back to the dressing room and peel off the purple suit. “Blecch – I’m glad to be done with that thing.” You are pretty sore from being kicked and punched for the last ten minutes. The rubber suit didn’t protect you much, in fact you wonder if it made the hits hurt more. You take a cool shower, which feels good after the heat of the rubber suit. You put on a soft robe, ready to go relax. But when you come out, Smilin’ Sam is there, chomping his cigar in a huge grin. His metal claw grabs your hand and pumps it in an overzealous handshake. “Great job, Player! Did you see that crowd? I knew Shufflefoot would be a big hit!” He claps you on the back, and you wince in pain as his claw pounds a bruise on your shoulder. “Oh… sorry, there, player! Well, rest up… because your next bout is in a couple of hours!”

“Wait… what?”

“It’s all part of the challenge! We sold these folks tickets for a triple feature! Shufflefoot, Realsports™ Boxing, and then a match against Mister Mean himself!”

“Mister… Mean?” you ask with some concern.

“Heh, that’s right! I bet you’re excited! Not everyone gets to go up against a star like that!” He claps your shoulder again, and you fall to the floor. “Whoops… sorry, kid… forgot about the shoulder.” He turns on his wheel. “Might as well rest while you’re down there. You’re going up against Iron Fists in just a couple hours.”

You wake up to find Melvin flitting back and forth in front of your face. “Hey, Player! Wake up! It’s almost time for you to get out there!”

You sit up, feeling bleary and sore. “Melvin, I don’t know if I can do this.”

“You’ve got to do it, Player! The Queen needs the ring back!”

“Right…” you mutter, painfully rising to your feet. “…the Queen.” You stagger a little bit. “Okay… what do I do?”

Melvin gestures to three rubber suits hanging on hooks, each a different variety of skin color. “Pick one of these.”

“Another rubber suit?” you exclaim.

“Calm down,” says Melvin. “These aren’t bad. Unlike the shufflefoot suit, these will give you some padding. So… who you gonna be? Jabbin’ Jack? Lefty O’ Leary? Or Macho Man?”

You look them over. “This one seems okay.” You climb into the suit, and unlike the last one, this one is actually comfortable, and doesn’t feel all slimy. And you can see pretty well.

Melvin whistles. “Wow! You look like a real boxer! The suit almost makes it look like you have some muscles!”

“Haw haw.” He’s right, though – you look like a professional boxer – gloves and everything. “So… how’s this work?”

“Well…” says Melvin, “this is Realsports™. It pretty much works like regular boxing. Hit ‘em a lot with a flurry of jabs, get in some body blows, and try to get in a payoff punch or two. You’ll fight seven rounds, or until someone gets KO’d.

You throw some punches while watching yourself in the mirror. “So… what do you know about… what’s his name?”

“Iron Fists.”

You swallow nervously. “Yeah… what do you know about him?”

“He’s tough,” admits Melvin. “But… they say he has tender ribs. If you can score a toe-to-toe body blow against him when your score bar starts blinking, you might be able to take him down.”

A little robot holds the door back out the ring open. “Okay, Player, you’re up!” says Melvin. “Remember – lots of jabs, and when the time is right, body blow!”

You jog out to the ring, and see lots of cheering fans. Your time unconscious on the floor did you good – you almost feel like you could do this!

Place the Realsports™ Boxing cartridge into your Atari 2600. Use game select 1, and set the difficulty switch to a. Play until you win a match. Post a link to a video in the comments section of yourself completing the challenge.